Sunday, December 27, 2009

Not what I was hoping for...but I'll take it! :D

This week I did pretty well.  :D  I didn't really have any sweets.  I mean...hardly any.  I only ate one meal on Christmas...but it was a BIG one!  I almost made myself sick.  Almost.  I only worked out once this week...and walked 3 times.  Yes, we are slacking a bit but it was Christmas.  Stepping on the scale today I was hoping for a loss.  I mean...really...I would've been SUPER disappointed if I had stayed the same or worse...gained.  So I step on the scale...and I almost start jumping up and down from the excitement!  I lost 3 lbs. this week.  I LOST 3 LBS. DURING THE WEEK OF CHRISTMAS!  OH MY GOSH!!!!  It was the most amazing feeling.  I can really do this.  It is SO possible.  I'm so very excited...can you tell?!  :D


I'm contemplating joining a gym...or taking Jazzercise...or both.  I know when David leaves I'll probably really need to join a gym.  There are 2 that are very close to the house...I just need to decide which one.  I mean...the 24 hour one is probably my best option.  Then I won't have any excuses.  Not any valid ones anyway.


Right now my total is -22 lbs.  Yes, I do think that is absolutely AMAZING!  I'm very proud of myself.  I'm fully aware that my chances of meeting my -30 lbs. goal by next week is unlikely.  That's ok.  I'll end up getting pretty close.  Any weightloss at this point is more than welcome.  I mean...I would rather it be 3-5 lbs. a week if not more but I will welcome anything.  Staying the same really sucks.  Gaining is even worse.  I haven't gained yet.  The week that I do is NOT going to be fun.  Hopefully it won't come to that.  I think I'm pretty much in control at this point.  I never go overboard...I tend to stop myself just before I make myself too full.  Yes, you can SO be too full.  Hopefully everyone is aware of that!  :D  At one point I had a hard time knowing when to stop.  Usually I wouldn't realize it until I had already made myself sick.  Not everyone has this problem...but I did.  It is NO LONGER a problem...and that fact makes me smile.  :D


So this weekend is going to be another challenge...a challenge that I plan on conquering!  We will be in Atlanta this weekend...which means...lots of eating out.   I know that I have the ability to make the right choices.  I just have to decide to do so.  I am going to have people with me to hold me accountable...and one that is willing to eat healthy with me.  Yay!  That will make it easier.  To know that I'm not the only one NOT consuming the yummy goodness of grease and such will give me comfort.  I know that sounds crazy...but I don't care.  Hopefully this time next week I will be down at least 25 lbs.  I'm hoping for more like 27.  We shall see!!  :D

Friday, December 25, 2009

2009...

This may be a week early...but that's ok!  :D  I don't mind!  Hahahaha! 


Well...I have to admit a LOT of pretty amazing things happened this year.  It will go down in the books as a year I'll never forget.  I had a lot of "firsts" this year.  That's probably what makes it so memorable.  


I brought 2009 in with new friends.  I met them in December and I think they're pretty amazing.  I see them just about every Thursday now.  :D  I drive to Mt. Olive and attend a service for 18+ on Thursdays.  I don't make it every week but I do try my best.  I went to the beach with them this summer and we had SO much fun!  I never get tired of meeting new people that's for sure!  


I also flew on a plane for the first time.  It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be.  I have to admit...the first time we hit turbulence I thought we were going to die!  Haha!  We obviously didn't and from then on I kind of knew what to expect.  


I went out of the country for the first time EVER!  It was AMAZING.  We went to Costa Rica on a mission trip.  We were there for 7 days and I can't wait to go back in 2010.  Missions is something I would like to continue to be very involved with.  


I went on my first cruise this year.  It was SO much fun!  I was the person that never thought I would do something like that.  The thought of being out in the middle of the ocean with no land around kind of terrified me.  It wasn't scary at all.  It was actually one of the coolest things that I've ever experienced.  I loved being able to go out on the deck and just look at the ocean for hours and know that nothing else was around.  To think...God created all of this.  AMAZING!


I found some things out about myself this year.  Some of these things I have known and just never decided to do anything about it.  Some are kind of...well...new.  :D  I realized that I'm selfish...more selfish than I'd thought...and I'm working on it.  I'm very opinionated and not afraid to tell people what I think...but found that no matter what I will LOVE in any given situation.  I'll let you know how I feel about whatever it might be but will LOVE no matter what.  That's HUGE!  I'm completely honest almost all of the time.  Some people love that and some people just can't handle it.  I prefer honesty...obviously some don't.  I realized that I rely on people to much.  I'm a people person...I don't know if that will ever change.  What will change is who I place my total trust in.  It shouldn't shatter my world when I hear someone might move out of state or to another country or whatever.  I mean...being sad is definitely ok...but wondering what the heck I'm gonna do without them...isn't.  There are these things called cell phones...and email...ooh...and let's go old school and say letters.  If a person is that important to you then you will find a way to keep in touch.  Period.  It doesn't have to be the end of the world.  So...it isn't.  :D  I can be happy for them!  My trust is in the Lord.  He has my whole world in His hands.  He has a perfect plan for me.  I'm completely ok with that. 


I met David...randomly...this year.  He became a friend....then my personal trainer....now he's one of my roommates.  It's amazing how God works.  The path He's prepared for us is SO cool.  I obviously moved out of my house.  For the first time in my life I don't live with my dad.  I'm super excited about that!  I also realized this year that I was tired of being unhealthy.  I was offered help...and for some reason...this time...I decided that I'd take it.  I will always be grateful for what David has done for me.  He promised that he wouldn't give up on me but I couldn't give up on myself either.  I think each of us has kept that promise so far.  When he leaves I'll really have to keep that promise.  I can't give up.  I won't.  :D  I can't give him ALL the credit though.  God placed us in each other's path...He also gave me the ability to get  through this...to decide that it was time.  I never thought I'd be successful in weightloss.  NEVER.  I think that's why I never stuck with it before.  I mean...I'd try and it would last a couple of months and then I'd quit.  I'd find some excuse...it was the summer...it was my birthday...someone's birthday...anyone's birthday.  Not this time.  I've realized that it's not worth it.  Not anymore.  I don't want to be this way anymore.  I want to be healthy and I'm not doing this for anyone but me.  :D  I think that's very important.  If you're doing it for anyone but you...then what happens when whoever you're doing it for isn't there anymore...or they decide to give up on you?!  That's when you give up because the reason for doing it is gone.  That's why my reason for making this decision is ME!  i want to be happy with myself when I look in the mirror.  I want to be satisfied with what I see.  I don't want to have to worry that my stomach is hanging over my pants or my shirt has "all of a sudden" become too tight.  I want to know that I'm continuing to workout.  With or without David...I will do this.  It's probably not going to be easy when he first leaves but it will get easier.  I will find what works for me and I will do it to the best of my ability.  At this point I've lost 20 lbs.!!  Merry Christmas to me!  :D  I can do this...I will do this!!


2009 has been one AMAZING year!  I can't wait to see what 2010 has in store!  :D

Sunday, December 20, 2009

-19 lbs.!!! Whoo hoo!! :D

Well...I've lost 19 lbs. so far.  That's amazing!  


I started this journey on November 16th...that's just about 5 weeks.  :D  I'd say I'm doing pretty good so far.  I should have lost more but I had one week where I did stay the same.  I'm not gonna dwell on that though.  It's normal to hit a plateau every now and then.  I'm gonna stay positive and say that -19 lbs. is absolutely AMAZING!  :D  I'm really impressed with myself actually.  I mean...don't get me wrong.  If I was having to do this on my own right now I probably wouldn't be doing this well.  Luckily...God sent someone my way that was willing to help me out!  I'm super thankful for that.  In the near future I will be doing this on my own.  That kind of terrifies me...I'm not gonna lie.  It also makes me want to prove that I can do this.  David can't always be there to make me.  I'm gonna have to learn how to do this without him.  I will learn to do this on my own.  Before he leaves we're going to make sure I'm fully prepared.  Pre-made workouts and all.  :D


So...I could still meet my goal of -30 lbs. by January 2nd but I would really have to do AMAZINGLY well at Christmas.  I mean...I could do it.  What better present to myself than to have truly reached my first small goal!  That's what I'm hoping for anyways.  Time will tell.  Even if I don't reach my goal I'll end up getting really close.  I'm ok with that.  I mean...I want to be down 30 lbs.  I really do.  I just have to make it happen.  So this week I'm going to be really focussed.  No sweets.  Well...I will be having at least one of Pam's special Christmas cookies.  They're amazing and she only makes them a couple times a year.  I'll just have to save up some calories for that one.  :D  No going over my calories!  No way!  It's totally not worth it.  You only taste that food for like 5 minutes...but it can have long lasting effects on your life.  Especially if you continually eat the wrong stuff.  So the plan is to make it through this week and then it should be smoothe sailing from that point on.  Awe...sailing.  :D  Anyways...hopefully I'll be down at least 5 or 6 lbs. next week...which would mean that I would be 4 lbs. away from my goal.  Whooo hoooo!!!!!  I SO GOT THIS!!!  :D

Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Changing Things Up...

So this post isn't really about my weight loss.  This is about me...my walk...and a lesson that I believe the Lord is trying to teach me.  He's been trying to teach me for a while...I just don't seem to listen.  I'm a people person.  I would much rather be with people than be alone.  That's just the way I am...the way I've always been.  I tend to put the people in my life before God.  I don't think I necessarily do it intentionally...it just kind of happens.  I also tend to rely on people like crazy!  In all reality the One I should be relying on is the One I neglect the most.  I've said this before and I'll say it again.  I know all the right answers.  I know exactly what I should be doing.  I just don't do it.  I don't have a reason why.  I just don't.  What can I say?!  I'm a work in progress.  We all are I suppose...and will continue to be.  I want to be different.  I will be different.  I'm working on my physical health...now I just need to work on my spiritual health.  :D  The Lord is in the process of showing me that at any given time any one of the people that I rely on...or put before Him...can be taken away.  Not necessarily in death, it could be...in a move...a change of careers...etc.  He wants me to rely on Him and Him alone.  People let you down.  People move on.  People change...including me!  So what brought this on?  Well...I realized today that I'm SO selfish!  My friend/personal trainer, David, has decided to join the Navy.  Was I supportive?  Ish.  I really just wanted to convince him that God didn't have that in mind for him.  I know...I'm terrible!  I didn't try to do that though.  I was supportive-ish.  :D  Then I got really sad.  Thinking about it really happening really started to bother me.  Then you ask yourself why?  BECAUSE I'M A HORRIBLE...TERRIBLE...SELFISH PERSON!  He's a new friend.  He's my trainer.  He's about to be my roommate.  I mean...I rely on him.  How am I going to lose weight without him?  How can I workout without him?  I'm definitely going to miss him like crazy!  Then I realize that I'm being a bit dramatic.  It's not all about me!  I know I like to think that it is...but it SO isn't.  It's all about Him...bringing glory and honor to the name above all names...Jesus Christ!  I need to give up my "control".  I know that.  I've known for a while now.  I think that's part of this lesson the Lord is trying to teach me through this.  So...I'm listening.  I totally and completely support David in his decision and I'm SUPER excited for him and this journey he's about to begin.  Yes, I can lose weight on my own.  Yes, I can workout on my own.  I know what to do.  I've been doing it for a month now.  I would've eventually had to start doing this on my own anyways...it's just going to be sooner than I'd hoped.  It's not like David is leaving tomorrow.  I'll still have time with him to train...to hang out...etc.  I just need to be sure to focus while we're working out so that when he does leave I'll be ready.  I want to continue this journey that I began one month ago today.  :D  One month ago today was my first workout.  That's crazy!  -16 lbs. later...here I am.  I'm more motivated now than ever and I actually look forward to working out.  I never thought that would be possible.  For real.  God is doing some amazing things in my life...and I know He's no where near being finished!  I most definitely serve an AMAZING God! 


I CAN DO THIS!  :D  WITH GOD ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE!  I WILL BE A SUCCESS!

Monday, December 14, 2009

READY TO BE A SUCCESS!!! :D

I'm really prepared to be successful this week.  I went to the store last night and loaded up on low calorie food...that I actually like.  Eating things you like is SO important.  I mean...do you really think you're going to choose to eat something you don't like over something you do?  NO WAY!  You're just setting yourself up for disappointment.  So...I'm prepared.  :D


Last night I purchased the following:
*Cheese - 70 calories - I just can't live without it.
*Sugar Free Pudding - 60 calories - When I'm in the mood for something sweet this really helps!  Plus, I bring one with me if I know there will be cake where I'm heading...that way I don't feel left out.  :D
*Sugar Free Jello - 10 calories - I don't think I have to say much else...it's only 10 calories!  That's pretty amazing!  For real.
*Turkey - 6 slices = 50 calories
*100 Calorie Popcorn - You get a LARGE amount of popcorn for only 100 calories.  It's much more filling than any other 100 calorie item.
*1 Gallon of water - I'm not getting my water in.  The goal is to drink 1/2 gallon per day.  Hopefully I'll be able to achieve that today!  Actually, I'm almost there!!  :D
*Gala apples - 80 calories-ish - These are my FAVORITE!!
*No Sugar Added Mandarin Oranges - 40 calories
*No Sugar Added Peaches - 30 calories


Ok...so on any given day I can have 1,750 calories.  I've started writing everything down and keeping up with how many I have left.  It's amazing the difference it makes.  Seriously.  So far I've consumed 750 calories today.  That includes breakfast, a snack, and lunch.  I have 1,000 calories remaining for dinner and a snack if I want one.  I can assure you I won't be going over those calories today!  I also plan to walk tonight.  As soon as I get off work I'm headed to the church to do so!  :D  I will be successful this week and in the coming weeks and months!!  I'm only 14 lbs. away from reaching my first small goal.  Eeeeep!  That's so exciting!  I can't wait!!!!!!


I SO GOT THIS!!!

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Good News Indeed!

-16 lbs and counting!!  Whoo hoooooo!!  :D


This week was a bit challenging.  I had 2 Christmas parties and I went over my calories twice.  No one said it would be easy.  It's not...but it's most definitely getting better...easier.  Today's workout wasn't terrible.  I actually felt great immediately afterward.  Usually I feel like death for at least 5-10 minutes after a workout.  


I did accomplish one of my goals for the week!  I walked 4 days...that's pretty AMAZING.  I still need to work on the water.  It's a work in progress.  I'm sure I'll learn to love it just as much as I'll love exercise...it's just going to take time.  


I'm going to the store tonight.  I need to re-stock my healthy stuff.  That was part of the problem last week.  I just didn't make time to go to the store and purchase what I needed.  If I would've had healthy things on hand I wouldn't have chosen the things I had to eat last week.  I also think it would be a good idea for me to NOT eat anything that I can't get the nutritional information on.  I mean...guessing is almost never accurate.  Most places have their nutritional information listed on the internet so that does make it easier.  I just have to say no to lunches that are brought in by reps from places that don't list their nutrition.  I think that will make a huge difference!


I'm only 14 lbs. away from reaching my first small goal!  I'm SUPER excited about that!!

Friday, December 11, 2009

The Christmas Parties Have Begun...

Well...tonight was my first Christmas party and let me just say...I LOVE CHRISTMAS!!!!  It definitely is a time of year that makes me happy.  It's the one time when I'm all about making others smile.  I mean...I try to do that all year but especially this time of year!  It's taken me a long time to really believe that to give is way better than to receive.  Don't get me wrong...I love presents just as much as the next person but to know that you made someone's day or made them feel just a little special by giving them a gift...I think that's kind of amazing!  :D  What I don't think is amazing is the amount of food that is being delivered to my office.  I mean it's seriously ridiculous!  To be honest, I really have a hard time walking away.  I haven't done too badly this week but yesterday they delivered 6 tins of chocolate covered nuts!  I want to put up signs that say, "CAN'T YOU SEE WE ARE ALL FAT?!  SEND US SOME FRUIT PLEASE!".  You know...I wouldn't have a problem with my weight if food wasn't so good!  Haha.  If it tasted like dirt then I could most definitely walk away without a problem.  My co-workers have learned that if they tell me it's not great then that makes it SO much easier for me.  Most of the time they aren't telling the truth but that's ok!!  Lie to me!!  Tell me it's nasty!  I don't need to hear how great it is.  That just makes it that much more difficult.  Lots of people are looking out for me and holding me accountable.  It really makes a difference.  I don't need you to stand by and watch me make a mistake.  SLAP MY HAND!  :D  I won't get mad...not for long anyways.  That's what I need right now....someone to tell me NO.

So...last week I didn't lose any weight.  Boo.  I was SO disappointed but I know that happens on occasion.  David decided that I should be keeping a food journal.  So this week I've been writing down everything I eat and that is making me keep up with my calories.  Writing it down is annoying but it makes you realize what you're consuming instead of just guessing at how many you might have left.  I did go over my calories twice but I don't think I did that bad....I could've done better though.  :(  I have to learn that it's not worth it.  Eating what I want isn't worth it if I'm not able to lose weight while doing so.  I know every now and then there will be a time when I can and will eat what is offered but I shouldn't be doing it now.  It's too early to be weak.  I need to continue to be disciplined.  In control.  This week started with that as my reality check.  I had to improve in two areas this week.  I needed to walk more and drink more water.  I don't know why the water is such a big deal for me...but it is.  I probably don't drink 64oz of any beverage in a day...let alone it just be water.  I haven't had any water at all today.  I KNOW THAT'S TERRIBLE!!  See...I'm the girl that knows all the answers.  I know what I should be doing...I know what's important but for some reason I don't do it.  Well...I didn't until now.  My health is important to me now.  It has nothing to do with a guy and everything to do with me!  :D  It's not going to be easy all the time but it will get easier.  Once all the sweets stop arriving at work I'll be just fine!  Until then it's going to be a struggle.  A struggle I plan on being strong enough to get through!!  

Hopefully the next time I update I'll have good news!!