NOT GUILTY! THANK YOU JESUS!!!

I stand accused.

There's a list a mile long.

Of all my sins.

Of everything that I've done wrong.

I'm so ashamed.

There's nowhere left for me to hide.

This is the day.

I must answer for my life.

My fate is in the Judge's hands.

But then He turns to me and says.

I know you, I love you.

I gave My life to save you.

Love paid the price for mercy.

My verdict, not guilty.

How can it be?

I can't begin to comprehend.

What kind of grace

Would take the place of all my sin?

I stand in awe.

Now that I have been set free.

And the tears well up

As I look at the cross

'Cause it should have been me.

My fate was in the nail scarred hands.

He stretched them out for me.

And said...

I know you, I love you.

I gave My life to save you.

Love paid the price for mercy.

My verdict, not guilty.

I'm falling on my knees to thank You.

With everything I am I'll praise You.

So grateful for the words I heard You say.

I know you, I love you.

I gave My life.

I know you, I love you.

I gave My life just to save you.

Love paid the price for mercy.

My verdict, not guilty.

Love paid the price for mercy.

My verdict, not guilty.

The above lyrics are from a song by Mandisa called "Not Guilty".  What an amazing thing to think about.  Not guilty.  He paid the price.  He chose to suffer and die so that I might live eternally with Him.  :D  But my Jesus didn't stay in that grave!  He's ALIVE!  He lives.  He has risen!  I can't imagine why He would choose me.  I'm a dirty sinner...yet he wants me.  ALL OF ME!  He loves me even though I let Him down every day.  That's SO amazing.  I don't think I'll every fully comprehend why.  He just does.  I am so very grateful.  For real.  :D  Just thinking about it makes me want to be a better person.  It makes me want to run up and down the streets telling people about Him and what He has done for me...for them.  People just don't get it sometimes.  Some have never heard the story of Jesus.  Others just don't care.  It breaks my heart.  Then I realize that I'm no better than anyone else.  I know the right answers.  I know Jesus and yet I don't live like I do.  I don't honor Him in my speech.  I don't glorify Him like I should.  I don't even talk to Him everyday.  That's pathetic.  It's just sad really.  Sometimes I wonder what He's thinking when He looks at me.  Is He proud at times?  Disappointed?  Heart broken?  Angry?  Joyful?  I don't think I really want to know the answer.  I want my Savior to be proud of me.  I just don't see how in the world He could be.  All I know to do is learn from my mistakes and try to be better tomorrow.  Always learning.  Always changing.  Always loving.  Striving to be like Christ.  I want to be a light in the darkness.

OH MY GOSH!

Ok...so my official weigh in day is Sunday but I couldn't wait.  I'll update again tomorrow if it's different.  I got on the scale yesterday morning and I have reached my first little goal!!!  It's about 13 days late but that's just fine!  :D  I'm at -30 lbs.!!!!!  Holy crap!  That's amazing!  I have never been so excited about something in my entire life!  I immediately ran around the office and told everyone.  Then I ran to my phone.  There was one person I had to share this exciting news with.  The person that helped me get this whole process started.  He was just as excited as I was!!  I expected nothing less.  :D  Then he asked if I had cried yet.  At that moment the tears started forming in my eyes.  They were tears of pure joy of course.  It's like in that moment I realized that this is really possible.  I can really do this.  Those aren't just words...they are truth.  :D  I know I keep saying this but I'm gonna say it again.  I never thought this was possible.  I really never believed that I could do this.  I know I said I could.  I told myself over and over again that this time would be different.  I just never fully believed that it would be.  I've tried this a million times.  I've never stuck with it before.  Until now.  :D  This time has most definitely been different!!  I am a success.  Gosh...I love thinking about it.  I love wondering what I will look like when I've lost 80 lbs.  It's such an exciting thing.  It makes me smile every time I think about it.  Some of the people around me are realizing that they can do this too.  They want to start eating healthy and exercise.  They are seeing me succeed and thinking that they can do it as well.  That's amazing!  Of course you can do it!  :D  Everyone keeps asking, "What are you doing to lose the weight?".  They really hate it when I say, "Diet and exercise.  It really does work."  I'm SO serious when I say that.  I'm not on any medicine.  I haven't had any surgery.  My weight loss comes straight from changing my calorie intake and exercising more.  Period.  That's all.  There isn't some magic pill I've found or some spectacular surgery that I've stumbled across.  It's just me trying to eat healthier...be healthier.  I love saying that.  It makes me so proud to know that I can do this on my own.  Well...I don't mean completely on my own.  I did have a trainer for a little while.  You know...I think everyone needs someone that can push them beyond their limits those first couple of weeks.  I don't think I would've stuck with it if I hadn't had David to push me.  He held me accountable without knowing it.  I felt like I had to eat right because if I didn't then I was wasting his time.  It made me be good.  I know that sounds crazy but it worked for me.  I knew he was taking time out of his day to help me workout and if I didn't eat right then the workout wasn't doing much good.  So...find someone that can help you.  See if a friend is willing to hold you accountable.  I love it when people tell me I shouldn't be eating something!!  Seriously.  I need that in my life.  I need those people that will tell me NO!  :D  It doesn't offend me at all.  It shows me that they care!  Weight loss is possible.  No...it's not always easy but it does get easier.  You learn to love other things.  It's not terrible.  You're not going to die if you get fruit instead of fries.  I say that because I really thought I would die if I started replacing things with fruit or other healthier choices.  Really?!  Who wants fruit?!  I do!  I want fruit!  I want to be healthy!  I want to make the right decisions when we're out at a restaurant.  It is difficult at times...I'm not gonna lie...but it's SO worth it.  There are always healthy options.  You just have to really look to find them sometimes.  :D  Weight loss is most definitely possible!  Just try it and see!!!!


Well...I think that's all for now!  Hopefully I'll get to update tomorrow with more spectaclar news!

I've lost 30 lbs.!!!  Whoooo hooooooooooooooo!!!!!!

Whoo to the Hoo! :D

I have had the most amazing day EVER!  I decided to weigh today.  For some reason I knew the results would be good...well...AMAZING!  :D  I've been afraid to get on the scale lately.  The main reason is because I haven't been working out like I had been.  I just haven't made the time and that's completely my own fault.  I can't blame anyone else.  So...I stepped on the scale today...and...holy crap...I've lost 6 more lbs.  Whoo hoo.  My total is -26 lbs.  :D  That makes me super excited.  For real.  I can't believe it.  I called Riviera Fitness today and I really think I'm going to join this week.  The manager was super nice and it's really inexpensive.  Plus, it's really close to the house.  :D  I'm really excited about it actually.  I never thought that I would be able to stick with this.  Not only am I sticking with it...I'm succeeding.  That's amazing.  Absolutely amazing.  I can do this.  I am doing this.  Sometimes I want to scream out loud for all to hear, "It really does work!  Diet and exercise is the key!".  I have found that to be 100% true.  I am so excited about this journey that is just now beginning.  I can't wait to see how much I've lost by this time next year!!  Gosh...just thinking about it gets me so excited!!!!  Hopefully I'll be writing with even better news soon!  :D  Yay!

Movies! :D

So I have a pretty lofty goal to watch 365 movies this year.  Ha!  I know...that's crazy.  I do believe it can be done!  :D


This shall be my running list of movies I've seen this year and I will update it often!  Enjoy!


1.  Julie and Julia - 1/1/10 - First time to see this.  It was pretty good.
2.  A Time to Kill - 1/1/10 - An old favorite.  Oh, Matthew.
3.  Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest - 1/6/10 - OMG!  I love these movies!! 
4.  Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End - 1/7/10
5.  Jumanji - 1/8/10 - Yes, I'm serious!  It makes me happy!  :D
6.  House On a Haunted Hill - 1/8/10 - Not great.
7.  The Last Samurai - 1/10/10 - I love this movie!
8.  Elizabethtown - 1/12/10 - Not bad...not bad at all.
9.  The Day After Tomorrow - 1/14/10 - Good movie.
10.  The Bone Collector - 1/15/10 - I love Denzel and Angelina!!
11.  The Family Stone - 1/16/10 - Luke Wilson & Claire Danes - love them!!!
12.  Taking Lives - 1/16/10 - Angelina Jolie, Ethan Hawke - Pretty good movie.
13.  A Few Good Men - 1/17/10 - Jack Nicholson, Tom Cruise, Demi Moore - AMAZING MOVIE!!!
14.  The Book of Eli - 1/17/10 - Denzel Washington was AMAZING in this!
15.  V for Vendetta - 1/18/10
16.  Contact - 1/18/10 - Jodie Foster & Matthew McConaughey - I love this movie!!
17.  I Can Do Bad All By Myself - 1/20/10 - Freaking hilarious!
18.  The Invention of Lying - 1/22/10
19.  Something to Talk About - 1/23/10 - I LOVE JULIA ROBERTS!!
20.  The Abyss - 1/24/10 - Ed Harris is one of my favorites!
21.  My Big Fat Greek Wedding - 1/28/10 - Windex cures everything!  Hahahaha!!  :D
22.  Sixteen Candles - 2/6/10 - Not as good as I remembered it being.  :(
23.  My Life in Ruins - Loved it!  :D
24.  Ghost of Girlfriends Past - eh.
25.  The Taking of Pelham 123 - Not terrific.
26.  Batman:  The Dark Knight - Amazing!  :D
27.  The Informant - Terrible movie!  
28.  Precious - Be prepared to be angry!  This movie made me so mad!
29.  Up in the Air - eh.
30.  Alice in Wonderland - Loved it!  :D
31.  Twilight - Yay!  :D
32.  Drop Dead Fred - OMG!  I can't tell you how much I love this movie!  :D
33.  Serendipity - So good!
34.  The Ugly Truth - LOVED IT!!!!
35.  The Blind Side - Sandra Bullock was amazing in this movie!  It was SO good!  :D
36.  Sherlock Holmes - GREAT MOVIE!
37.  Clash of the Titans - Not bad, not bad at all.  I'd definitely see it again!
38.  Beetlejuice - Still one of my favorites!  Don't judge!  :D
39.  The Proposal - OMG!  I loved this SO much!!!!
40.  Mr. Wonderful - Old school.  This movie took me back.
41.  That Touch of Mink - I love Cary Grant!  :D
42.  Iron Man - Love it!  I can't wait for the second one to come out!
43.  Flight of the Pheonix
44.  Inglorious Basterds - Hahaha.  Awesome.
45.  New Moon - :D
46.  Kick Ass - 4/16/10 - Hahahahaha!  Funnier than I expected!
47.  Terminator 2:  Judgement Day - 4/18/10
48.  Kate & Leopold - 4/19/10
49.  Fried Green Tomatoes - 4/19/10
50.  Charlie's Angels:  Full Throttle - 4/24/10
51.  National Treasure - 4/24/10
52.  The Lovely Bones - 4/24/10 - This movie was amazing.  For real.
53.  Date Night - 5/1/10 - SO FREAKIN' FUNNY!!!
54.  It's Complicated - 5/1/10 - SO GOOD!!!
55.  Avatar - Loved it!
56.  Iron Man 2 - AMAZING!!!  :D
57.  The Perfect Storm - so sad...
58.  Clue - funny.
59.  Eclipse - Best one of the series so far!
60.  The Lost Boys - classic.
61.  The Good Shepherd
62.  Zodiac
63.  St. Elmo's Fire - STILL LOVE IT!
64.  P.S. I Love You - saddest movie EVER.
65.  27 Dresses - One of my favorites.  :o)
66.  Remember Me - Oh.  So.  Sad.
67.  Mr. & Mrs. Smith - AMAZING MOVIE!
68.  Avatar:  The Last Airbender - not as good as I expected it to be.
69.  Leap Year - Love it!
70.  When in Rome - super cute.
71.  Shutter Island - freaky.
72.  Valentine's Day - adorable.
73.  I heart Huckabee's
74.  From Hell - So strange.
75.  Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil - HILARIOUS!
76.  Sleepy Hollow - Love me some Johnny Depp.
77.  Hairspray - LOVE IT SO MUCH!
78.  Inception - AMAZING MOVIE!!
79.  Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs
80.  The Last Starfighter - YAY!!
81.  Did You Hear About the Morgans? - Not bad.
82.  Memento - GOOD MOVIE!
83.  Fright Night - Hahaha.
84.  Romy and Michele's High School Reunion - This will always be a favorite.
85.  G.I. Joe:  The Rise of Cobra - Eh.
86.  Letters to God - Sad movie!
87.  Old Dogs - HILARIOUS!
88.  Labyrinth  - Love it!
89.  Aliens - Classic.
90.  The Back-Up Plan - LOVED IT!!!!
91.  I'm Reed Fish - Okay.
92.  Airheads - BAHAHAHAHA.
93.  The Pick-Up Artist
94.  A Mighty Heart - Pretty good.
95.  Serious Moonlight
96.  Dear John - Eh.
97.  Kiss the Girls - Really good movie.
98.  The Count of Monte Cristo - OMG.  AMAZING.
99.  Little Monsters - Childhood fave.
100.  Twisted - GREAT!
101.  The 'Burbs - Hahahaha.
102.  Gangs of New York
103.  The Fall - So strange.
104.  Solitary Man - Eh.
105.  Karate Kid - Little Smith was amazing!  SO GOOD!!!
106.  Letters to Juliet - LOVED IT!
107.  Queen of the Damned - Not bad.
108.  The Order - eh.
109.  SALT - OMG.  Good movie!!!!
110.  The Gift
111.  Amistad - Based on a true story.  Very good movie.
112.  Wonder Boys
113.  Four Christmases - HILARIOUS!  LOVE IT!
114.  Paranormal Activity - OMG.  One of the scariest movies I've ever seen.
115.  The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - Pretty good.
116.  Madea Goes to Jail - HAHAHAHAHA.
117.  Kramer vs. Kramer - Meryl Streep!  Dustin Hoffman!  Love them!
118.  Over the Top - Classic.
119.  Confessions of a Shopaholic - LOVE IT!
120.  Philadelphia
121.  Wild Hogs - Hahaha.
122.  2012 - Good movie.
123.  The Core - Hilary Swank!
124.  Surrogates - I love Bruce Wilis
125.  It Could Happen to You - NIc Cage  :o)
126.  Penelope - Weird....but I liked it.
127.  The Cure - sad movie.
128.  Law Abiding Citizen - Hello, Gerard Butler
129.  What's Eating Gilbert Grape? - Johnny Depp...OMG.
130.  So I Married an Axe Murderer
131.  The Firm
132.  Shakespeare in Love
133.  10 Things I Hate About You
134.  Candyman
135.  Mortal Kombat:  The Movie
136.  New York, I Love You
137.  The Constant Gardener
138.  Black Hawk Down
139.  
140.





 

Passion 2010

I just returned from one of the most amazing conferences.  I attended Passion 2010 and if you don't know what that is I suggest you find out!  :D  Basically it was 22,000 college students and adults coming together to worship Jesus Christ and to be taught by some of the most amazing speakers on this planet.  God really spoke to me this weekend.  He reminded me that it's all about Him...His glory.  It made me ask myself a few questions as well.  Am I living a life worthy of the calling of Christ?  Do I "walk the walk and talk the talk"?  Do people see the Jesus in me before they ever see me at all?  The answer to all of those was a big resounding NO.  Don't get me wrong...I love Jesus.  I am SO thankful that He was willing to suffer and die for me!  He chose me!  He created me!  He has prepared a path for me!  All of those things leave me speechless...most of the time.  I don't want that to sound terrible...I just want to be honest no matter what the cost.  What I do mean is this....It's just so easy to put all of those mind blowing things aside and let your attention be focussed elsewhere.  Especially someone like me.  I am emotional...always.  I long to be around people at all times....etc.  I feel like the Lord is jumping up and down trying to get my attention and I'm too busy doing something else.  My goal after coming home is to spend more time with Him.  I've never been one to have a consistent quiet time.  I hate saying that.  I have known Jesus for 16 years and I've never had a consistent quiet time.  That's so terribly sad.  I have no excuse at all.  I try and I do well for a couple of months then I miss a day...then 2 days...then a week.  Then I can't remember when the last time I dove into the Word was.  It's at this point where He gives me a bit of a reality check.  I know the routine all too well.  I kind of had that this weekend.  I'm not where I need to be at all in my relationship with Christ.  I want to hunger and thirst for Him and His Word like I've never hungered and thirsted for anything in my entire life.  I want my life, my walk, and my talk to be all about Jesus!  I want to worship freely without worrying what other people might think.  Whether that be by dance...or raising my hands...or just being still in His Holy presence...I just want to be real.  Authentic.  :D  I want that to be evident in my life.  I want His presence to radiate from me so brightly that it just about blinds people.  I want to love unconditionally.  I want to become the woman that He has created me to be.  :D  I love my Jesus!  He is absolutely amazing!!!  I'm super excited about the path He has set before me.  I can't wait to see what He's going to do in me and through me this year!  Here I am Lord, send me!


Our God is greater!  Our God is stronger!  God You are higher than any other!  Our God is Healer!  Awesome in power!  Our God, our God!


For You and You alone awake my soul, awake my soul and sing!  For the world You love let Your will be done, let Your will be done in me!


You're all that we want!  You're all that we need!  You're all that we want!  You're all that we need!  We know where the Spirit of the Lord is...Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is Liberty!  We know we're living in Your freedom...Living in Your freedom to see Your glory!  We know where the Spirit of the Lord is...Where the Spirit of the Lord is there is Liberty!  We are Yours and Yours is the Kingdom!  We are Yours and Yours is the Kingdom!

EXERCISE...

I feel like a total failure.  David and I have probably worked out 3 times in the last 3 weeks.  :(  To be honest...that really sucks.  I have been walking but right now I can only do that on the weekends because it's completely dark when I get home during the week.  I guess I just need to get back on track.  I mean...I'm still eating healthy and everything...I'm just not exercising.  I can't believe I'm about to say this...I MISS THE EXERCISE!  That is SO weird.  I don't like to exercise.  I'm lazy.  I guess I'm changing for the good!  :D  I do need to re-evaluate things.  We either need to get back in our workout routine...or I need to join a gym...or jazzercise.  I was leaning towards jazzercise but it really makes me nervous.  I don't know why.  It just does.  Basically...I just need to make a decision!  Hopefully things will be back to normal soon!  :D